DOOR CRASHER DEVILS!!

[Devils]

I'm Steven Dedrick here at the Dedrick Devils trade block! I mean, there's so many deals here! And there's so many Zetterbergs! Backlunds! Folignos, I think! I can't, I'm not 100 percent sure what we have here, because I can't see anything! Our prices, I hope, aren't too low!

Check out this Zetterberg! Averaging out around 50-55 points, but I don't even know if he will play! Wanna gamble? Upgrade my 73rd pick! What about this Backlund? 2nd line centre in Calgary! Who does he play with? I'm not entirely sure! Could be Tkachuk and Neal, or someone I have never heard of before! Expect 50 points! I should probably keep him! Give me a pick in 2019! That's fair, I think. What about this Foligno? Is he a centre or a winger? I have no idea, give me anything for his 45 points!

I'm Steven Dedrick! Everything's black! I can't see a thing! And also, I can't feel anything either, did I mention that? But that's not as catchy, as not seeing, so... that always goes... y'know, off by the wayside! I can't feel, it's a very rare disease, all my se— all my nerves, they don't allow for the sensation of touch! So I never know what's going on! Am I standing, sitting? I don't know!

[Scorpions]

Bahaha


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[Goldminers]

Hahaha Rick and Morty inspiration?

[Devils]

Bingo


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[Goldminers]

How did I get here?

[Devils]

Look at this. You beat cancer then went back to work at the Carpet store? Booo.